#HTE

The Weekly Design Roast, #23

“As you can see, this chair has many useful configurations.”

(This is a cigarette-lighter air freshener for cars.) “The aesthetic I was going for is ‘Interstellar Asgardian Weapon.’”

This “smartphone addiction solution” storage object is electromagnetically-shielded, so any phone you place inside cannot receive a signal. I guess you could also just turn your phone off, but this object has the added benefit of taking up desk space and costing money.

This is a scooter concept meant to change shape as it accelerates. Just don’t accelerate too quickly.

“We couldn’t figure out how to attach a windshield, but one of our engineers came up with a clever workaround.”

I guarantee this “globe wheel” concept car was designed by someone who never had to clean out the little rubber sphere in an old-school computer mouse.

“I like the look of the strong, thick shaft. And at night it emits a powerful, penetrating beam out of the front.”

This is a luxury hoverboard “geared towards more mature consumers.” Er, don’t mature consumers…avoid riding hoverboards?

This sofa was designed to rock…from side-to-side. It’s perfect for if you want to accidentally kill your cat or crush your dropped remote. You can also alienate your weight-conscious friends; when they’re sitting on one side and you’re on the other, make a big show about how you have to hold some kettlebells as “ballast” just to keep the damn thing level.

This is a leather chess board that comes with silicone bands delineating the pieces; you’re meant to find and gather rocks to tie the bands around, in order to complete the pieces (I’m not kidding). I’d like to see a Checkers variant of this–it would come with the board, a sausage, a zucchini, and a chef’s knife.