#HTE

This Explosive Alarm Will Blow Bike Thieves Away

Bike and motorcycle theft is a stinking, slinking and subtle affair, but inventor Yannick Read wants to blow it wide open. His extreme bike alarm, called the Bike Mine, would harness all the explosive noise and surprise of an actual explosion to arm your ride against interlopers. 

How does it work? By strapping an actual explosive charge and detonation chamber to your bike. Does that sound dangerous? …Yes, Virginia, it does sound dangerous. Does it sound like it could scare the brains out of a potential thief and alert me that my precious steed was moving unbidden? Also yes.

To make this thing work you Velcro the chamber to part of your bike or motorcycle, place a charge in the chamber, and use a titanium lead to attach the spring-loaded hammer to a part that would revolve if moved. If this trigger does move, it releases the hammer, gracing you with a blinding and deafening 150 decibel explosion, not an easily-thieved bicycle.

If that doesn’t say Death To Bike Thieves better than some stupid sticker, I’ll eat my obnoxious messenger cap.

The steel body of the unit contains the blast and makes it–ostensibly–safe and legal for personal use. Since a lot of theft takes place at night or in low visibility conditions, the sonic impact would be paired with pretty big visual surprise value (Holy shit, why is this bike on fire?) and potentially impaired sight. The overall impact of the alarm might not be enough to totally stop a dedicated or professional thief, but the noise would be enough to draw some attention even in jaded and noisy neighborhoods. 

The viability of this alarm as a successful deterrent depends enormously on where you leave your ride, and the likelihood that it could be triggered by something other than thievery. Motorcycles are fairly stationary once parked, but bikes are lightweight and can get squirrely if parked poorly.

My own bike shed houses a herd of expensive but under-ridden bikes, and an alarm like this on the easiest to reach or hardest to replace would make a lot of sense. But if I lacked secure parking spaces or had to share my stable with other bumbling humans, like some kind of peasant, this would be less smart… Unless you think terrorizing honest people or testing your own cardiac strength are secondary benefits. 

It’s no replacement for a good lock and good luck, but all in all this is a badass design, executed with fun and flair by the same guy who brought to us the Guinness Book-confirmed World’s Loudest bike horn. Which is to say: screw the neighbors if you can made bike safety this awesome.

The Bike Mine Kickstarter campaign runs through June 24, 2016.